Who Do You Need To Forgive?

Who Do You Need To Forgive?

Hey there,
Good morning and happy Sunday to you,

I am back home in Hawaii for the next month and to say the least, I’m extremely grateful. It’s always a gift to come back to the Big Island – a place I lived for four years. I moved off-island 18 years ago yet all this time away makes it more my home than ever before.

I’m also grateful to all of you for your kind and thoughtful responses about my health scare. Every word you wrote was greatly appreciated and very helpful.

Thank YOU.

What are you grateful for on this beautiful Sunday morning?

Better yet, WHO are you grateful for this morning? Who is the person you’re going to reach out to this morning and thank for making your life better?

Do that! Call them. They’ll love it and so will you.

One of the blessed things about being in Hawaii and where I stay (the MIDDLE of nowhere) is I don’t have access to the news or internet but because of this seclusion I am just now hearing about the tragic week of violent shootings.

I still don’t know much but what I do know is a lot of people – wives, sons, daughters, parents, friends – are not just hurting. They’re shattered.

And for what?

I don’t know about you but sometimes it feels like the whole world is losing it’s mind. And when I think about how we are ever going to solve it, sometimes I get overwhelmed by it all.

And some days even hopeless.

But today is not one of those days. Today I feel optimistic. Being in Hawaii certainly provides balance to all this craziness but it’s more than that.

I believe in us.

I believe in the good in us.

And I believe each one of us CAN make this world better TODAY. Literally, today by our actions, our love, our kindness, our compassion, our being of service.

And forgiveness. We need to give lots of forgiveness so that we all see “the other side.”

So that’s what I’d like to talk about today – forgiveness.


I had a tough week with a dear, old friend. This is someone I’ve known for almost 30 years and someone I would count as my closest friend in this profession. We’ve been through it all together and have always there for each other.

Recently something went down between us that caused a riff. I’ll spare you the details but the bottom line is he thought I should behave differently about our situation and I thought he should.

It seemed the more we tried to solve it the worse it got. In fact, it got to the point where our 30 year friendship was on the verge of blowing up for good because he chose to do the thing that I thought he shouldn’t and that he thought he should.

As I stared at the crossroad of our friendship it was clear I had a choice and that choice would have severe consequences. I could either choose to be right (not that I was, just that I could CHOOSE it) or I could choose our friendship.

I chose our friendship and that meant really understanding his point of view for choosing to do something that was very hurtful towards me and more importantly, it meant forgiving him for choosing it.

It also meant reaching out to him and asking his forgiveness for the way I behaved towards him and that meant I needed to stop being “right.”

It took a bit to get there but when I truly did I reached out to him and apologized. It’s clear from his response we still have some healing to do but he’s a wonderful man and a great friend and I want that (and pal, if you’re reading this today please know how true that is).

Who do you need to forgive?

What exchange took place between you and someone you care(d) about very much that caused a riff that you are no longer friends because of it?

I’m not talking about someone who you were never close to, who was always an ass towards you. I’m talking about someone you really loved having in your life and because of “something” you two are no longer talking.

Is not having them in your life worth it?

If this situation with my friend me anything it’s that there are ALWAYS two sides to EVERY story and if you only see your side, then in choosing to be right you will lose.

Are you done being right? If so, can you forgive them and even harder sometimes, ask them to forgive you?

I say choose forgiveness.

I say make two calls today. Call someone you’re incredibly grateful for and tell them how important they are to you and call someone you need to forgive and whom you’d like to forgive you.

Try it.

Choose love and friendship over ego and pride.

It’s really no choice. One leads to freedom and peace and the other leads to hell inside.

I choose to be happy.

How about you?

And by the way, be prepared that they may still be stuck in being right so they may not have the reaction you want or hoped for.

It’s ok.

Do it for you.

And maybe someday they’ll be ready to do the same. Maybe not.

Please let me know how it goes by hitting REPLY or if you’d like to share it with the others go to our Artistic Family Facebook page and let us all know.

Either way, I hope you have a beautiful day and go make this world better by your presence in it.

My very best,